I’m thinking of changing the title of my blog to “The Year of Mr. TV.” If I were to take the time, I’m sure I could find the percentage of blog posts that include a Mr. TV story. I think it’s somewhere around 80%. If you don’t find Mr. TV entertaining, then do not read on because this one revolves around him. And it’s a long one. Just like my day.
In fact, I think it’s safe to say that 80% of my school day revolves around him. The other 20% being this:
5% -- Mr. TV is in the computer lab (not because he needs it, because I NEED IT!)
5% -- Mr. TV is at lunch
5% -- Mr. TV is in his gifted group
5% -- Mr. TV is in Specials
But oh, that for that other 80% he is RIGHT THERE with me. If you know of him, you know he has a few ‘quirks’. Anyone who works with him should get an extra pat on the back. His last year teacher tried to warn me by telling me that some days she locked herself in the bathroom and cried. I will say he’s come a LONG way and the other students (for the most part) can tune him out. Actually, some of them help me give him reminders to follow the rules. He’s one of those kids that the whole day seems different when he’s absent.
As many of you know, this week is FCAT week. For us in the Second Grade this means:
*Our Specials time switches from “last thing of the day” to the “first thing of the day”
*Our school is a “Quiet Campus” which means we are supposed to be SILENT in the hallways as we pass the intermediate classrooms.
*Computer labs are closed (see 5% at top)
*We spend 3 uninterrupted hours in the classroom after lunch (Even a first year teacher can tell you that the focus of kids goes down after lunch.)
*Our whole daily schedule is wickety-wack.
To Mr. TV this means:
* HIS WHOLE LIFE HAS BEEN TURNED UPSIDE DOWN AND INSIDE OUT!
These are some highlights of the day:
First thing this morning…
Like I mentioned, it’s FCAT week. We are supposed to be quiet in the hallways. When we are leaving first thing in the morning to get to specials. Mr. TV made it to Music kinda-sorta quiet. On the way back? Not so much. He just couldn’t do his pelvis thrust/skip/ dance moves quietly (AKA the way he walks). Not to mention he was tripping on his untied shoelaces. My solution? I removed the shoes and he pelvic-thrusted/skipped/danced in his socks right on down the hallway. At least his voice was quiet. And I have to pick my battles…
I was answering questions about Native Americans and how they used natural resources to meet their everyday needs. (Some of you may remember that when I asked them who they first Americans were last week I got “Charlie Daniels” as an answer…So, we’re spending some extra time to clear up some misconceptions.)
Ms. Giggly: Ms. Buckler? How did the Native Americans use the bathroom?
Me: Well, I’m pretty sure their bodies worked like ours do now…
Ms. Giggly: Yeah, but where? (giggles from them all)
Me: Maybe they used the woods, or had a certain place just for that reason…
Mr. TV: THE BOYS AND GIRLS WENT TO THE BATHROOM IN FRONT OF EACH OTHER?! THAT’S IS JUST SOOOOOO WRONG! MAYBE THEY HAD A ‘BOYS’ TREE AND A ‘GIRLS’ BUSH!”
I lost them to the hilarity of that image and his tone. I even had to take a minute to hide behind the easel and take a few deep breaths. I may or may not have laughed a little.
Going to recess after lunch...After his time-out in another room #1…
Me: Mr. TV, have you been making good-choices so far today?
Him: ACTUALLY, NO.
Me: How many interruption tallies do you think are in your planner?
Him: LESS THAN INFINITY?
Me: Maybe. Where would you like to spend your time-out? On the playground or in another teacher’s room?
(Now I know what you’re thinking…this kid needs recess! But I tell you that all the walking around my classroom and pelvic-thrust/skip/dancing he does is plenty of physical activity. I COULD NOT let the other students see him getting recess when they would NEVER get recess if they did what he does. It’s the principle of it.)
Him: UM, C…NONE OF THE ABOVE?
Me: I’m sorry, Buddy. But there is only a choice A and a choice B. Make one quickly.
Him (screaming down the hallway): I DON’T LIKE EITHER OF THOSE CHOICES! YOU MAKE MY LIFE SO BORING!!!!!! (Then horrible Sponge-Bob sounding cries echo through the halls)
Note: He made it to the playground five minutes later and lay down in the grass and read his book silently. It was Captain Underpants so that was to be expected.
At the end of the day, when adding up his interruption tallies and discussing his goals for tomorrow…After time-out in another room #2…(Love you Mrs. Rood!)
Me: Mr. TV, do you think I would look good bald? Because you just might make me pull all my hair out if you have this many interruption tallies again. Maybe we can see if you can meet the goal of “Get fewer tallies than yesterday” and then how many days you can hold that record.
Him: Yeah, you’d look funny bald. But then it would be easy to grow it back as a mohawk.
To ease your mind about the loss of recess thing…He got to be Saturn at the end of the day when we were demonstrating how the planets rotate while they revolve around the sun. He did it happily while the whole time yelling, “LOOK AT ME! I’M SATURN! I HAVE RINGS!”
Now I know that you guys are probably looking at the things I say and can come up with a whole list of suggestions. Depending on my mood I may thank you for it. But, I’ll just bet you…whatever you suggest, I’ve tried it. We just take one day at a time in my classroom. And laugh most of it off. Is it wrong if I ask God to give me an extra rung on my ladder to heaven if I make it through this year?
And on and unrelated to Mr. TV note, I got this envelope in my mailbox. It is from one of my darlings who was absent today.
It clearly says:
To Elementary School
To Ms. Buckler
It was a picture of Leprechaun Boy in a tree. Warning: Leprechaun Trap post to come!